List of Three Vol. XXI

This week was all sorts of things and it got pretty frustrating, to tell you the truth. I wrote a paragraph at the beginning of the week —

It's only Tuesday. And I'm getting started on this week's List. I feel so out of it. I spent the day at home today and I've been trying to get myself to focus but it's just not happening. I can't get anything together and I'm aware that I'm not taking control of everything that I'm thinking and feeling at the moment. It sucks. I would gladly entertain this if it had been any other week but I just don't have the time to think, to feel. I hope that by tonight, or please, when I wake up tomorrow, this will all go away.

and I sincerely thought I would be able to have a much better week, you know? But I just felt…frustrated. Frustrated really is the word.


I can’t remember the last time I spent this much time in bed. All weekend, I was just in bed. I was on Netflix, I started rereading Harry Potter, I just let myself be lazy. I know, I have no right to do this considering that there’s really a lot to do, but I felt like I needed it.


Every single time I find myself in a situation where I end up winging things, I always tell myself it would be the last one and that I can’t blame anyone but myself for the consequences. That is exactly what happened during that one interview I needed to ace. The entire interview made me anxious, I had to keep reminding myself to give it my best, to be totally honest and transparent, and that the rest will just follow.


An old photo — Pattaya, 2017

For some reason, maybe brought about by the show that I just finished watching, I’ve been putting so much thought on regret. I dislike everything that comes with regret and it’s that one thing I don’t want my life to be, a life of regret. Life, so short and so beautiful, only to be filled with “should have’s” and “shouldn’t have’s” would be a total waste, would you think so too? Actions that lead to thoughts like this steal fleeting moments, moments that eventually make us realise that life is nothing but a fleeting moment.

Dead people receive more flowers than the living ones because regret is stronger than gratitude.

Anne Frank

So, I’ll end this blog post with just one more thought — be mindful and be intentional with your words and actions, be grateful, show kindness, and extend grace. life is fleeting.

By Maddie

Hi! I don't know what to say -- I'm not a big fan of introductions and the whole "tell people a little about yourself" thing sort of keeps me on edge so.

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